Help Me, Help You, Help Others...

By Jaime Willis

As I mentioned last week, I am going to be attending Camp Mighty in just under two weeks.   Part of our homework assignment is to raise $200 for Charity: Water.  I didn't know a thing about Charity: Water until this assignment, but man, is this organization cool.  In the "teaching people to fish" vein, Charity: Water funds water projects that help people in developing nations that don't have access to clean water get it.  They don't just ship over pallets of bottled water -- they build wells.  Right now, they are fund raising to buy more drilling rigs and other machinery that is required for well-making.  It's not enough that they are drilling wells, they want to drill faster.  This is truly a scalable model for sustainability and a truly worthy cause.

If you are interested, take three and a half minutes of your time to watch their video:

I've been a little lax in my fundraising efforts thus far, but that is about to change.  I am raffling off an iPad (1st Generation) to raise money for Charity Water.  This is my old iPad, so it is used, although still in great shape.  It's a 64 GB 3g + wifi iPad and it comes with it's own case and usb charger.  It was $900 when I bought it last year, and the used versions are going for $400 - 500 on eBay right now. But you could win it for $5!  How awesome would that be?  (AWESOME.) 

For $5, you will have one chance to win the iPad.  How?  Go to Paypal.com, and buy as many raffle tickets as you'd like between now and 12:00pm (noon) EST Friday, November 4th.  I'll randomly pick a winner (using a random number generator) at 12:00pm and announce the winner here on our blog.  

You win either way -- each raffle ticket will help Charity: Water bring more clean water to those in need, and you may even get a iPad and I complete my Camp Mighty homework!  Win - Win - Win!  

Don't like iPads, but want to help?  Check out what my teammates are doing to raise money:

Eden is raffling off jewelry, a cool camera, and an Amazon gift card here.

Amy is raffling off a $25 gift card, homemade brownies, a mixed CD, and other stuff here.  

Lisa is selling some awesome artwork here.

Erica is baking banana bread in exchange for donations here.

Linz is offering 20% off her design services (logos, t-shirts, and more) here. 

Alison is selling greeting cards here. 

Leslie is giving away prints of your choosing for your donations here. 

Andrea of Four Flights of Fancy is selling ad space on her blog here. 

Christine and Asha are teaming up to raffle off a $350 gift basket here or here. 

Hierarchy of Happiness

By Jaime Willis

Yesterday, a few coaches and I were talking about how to help our clients improve their lives and increase their happiness.  Because happiness is such a personal and not-well-defined concept, it is hard for people to figure out how to achieve it.

You can easily tell me what you don't like:  living in a small town, working for a micro-manager, dating a cheater, friends that don't call you back, turn signals, but it harder to identify the real-world situations that would give your life daily happiness and contentment. (I say real world, because it is fairly easy for us to all imagine how we would live if we won the lottery, but the odds of this experience are unlikely, and who wants to pin their potential happiness on a roll of the dice?)

I certainly don't have all the answers myself, but here's my guesses as to what makes people happy, in order of priority:

1) Basic Needs Met.  It's hard to stay happy if you are thirsty, hungry, or tired, or ill.  It's hard to be happy if you are constantly worried about getting kicked out of your house, getting your phone shut off, or if you don't have enough money to wash and buy new clothes.   Until you are able to take care of yourself (and your family, if you have one) on the most basic level, your happiness will likely suffer.

Interestingly, though, this threshold is very low.  You don't have to live extravagantly or be able to eat out every night of the week to be happy -- plenty of folks with tight budgets meet their needs every month and feel no pain in doing so.  My sister-in-law and brother are great examples of this -- my brother is a pastor and my sister-in-law works part time.  They are frugal, but they lack for none of the basics in their lives and are satisfied with what they do have.

2) Passion and Purpose.  I think it is hard to be happy if you don't feel like your life has direction or meaning.  As humans, we have a need to be needed, and a need to be a part of something larger than ourselves.  For some people, this passion and purpose is grounded by their religious beliefs, for others, it's grounded by their internal moral compass and life experience.

Figuring out your "who" is a critical component to your happiness.  Who are you?  What do you believe in?  How to you want to express that?  This sense of purpose is energizing and can build your energy and zest for life.  Once you figure out who you are, you are then ready to build healthy connections with others.

3) Connection.   A social worker once showed me her definition of the ideal relationship.  She raised both her right and left hand and made "Peace" signs (index and middle fingers raised, ring and pinky fingers touching your thumbs).  Then she overlapped each hands index finger to make a "W" sign.   Each peace sign or V was one person in a relationship.  The overlap was the parts of your life that you shared with each other.  Her point was that healthy (and happy) relationships (with family, friends, or significant others) don't "complete" you, they just add to your experience.

A friend of mine is fond of saying, "you don't get all your nuts from the same tree."  Same idea -- humans crave connection with each other -- we need a variety of relationships with our friends, with our family, and with our partners to fulfill our lives and help bring us meaning.

This may not be an exhaustive list, but I think it's a good start to finding your way to happiness.  

Photo Worthy

-by Matt Leedham

For nearly three weeks in Korea, the 6 of us (my in-laws, my wife’s sister and husband, and my wife and I) took over 3,000 pictures of our experience. Even I was impressed, and I like to take pictures.

I volunteered to take on the responsibility of sorting through the pictures, organizing them, and distributing them. After hours of work, I am almost done.

There were beautiful pictures...

There were heartwarming pictures...

There were multi-generational pictures...

There were funny pictures...

This morning, I asked my wife why it is that we took so many pictures. She gave the obvious answer…we want to remember the good times we had. Fair enough.

But I had more questions. Why were those moments so memorable? Why take pictures of the memorable moments? If they are memorable, won’t we remember them? Is it because they were unique and we want to share them?

I began to question why we don’t take 160 pictures per day all the time. Why don’t we want to capture every moment? Why aren’t we as proud of or as interested in every moment? Do some moments carry more weight? Are they more important?

I feel blessed that I am fortunate to have a camera and a desire to write because I feel that I have documented our Korean adventure quite well and we’ll be able to enjoy both the pictures and the stories for many years. But I am left questioning the importance of recording and capturing every other moment in my life.

Some people have taken on a challenge of a picture a day for one year, like our good friend Jeff Drongowski. Others have taken on that challenge but for longer, like Dave Lesh who speaks on the topic frequently.

The idea is to take one picture per day that captures the essence of how you felt or what you experienced. It’s more challenging than you might think, but the experience, according to them, changes your perspective on life. In fact, you end up creating more memorable moments so that you can record them.

We have limited time on this earth. Are you making the most of it? Is every moment, even during your daily routine, special and memorable? Don’t you think it should be? Capture it, record it, write about it, share it with others, and appreciate every experience you have.

Weekly Wednesday Inspiration #38

By Jaime Willis

HT: Reddit

A recent Seth Godin post gave the following anecdote:

A friend was waiting to hear about the results of a job interview. He hadn't heard in a while and he asked me, "how long before I should start worrying?"

Of course, the answer is, "You should never start worrying."

Worrying is not a useful output. Worrying doesn't change outcomes. Worrying ruins your day. Worrying distracts you from the work at hand. You may have fooled yourself into thinking that it's useful or unavoidable, but it's not. Now you've got one more thing to worry about. 

Not Better or Worse, Just Different

-by Matt Leedham

Less than 24 hours after being in Seoul, South Korea, I find myself with my wife, her sister and husband, and my in-laws walking down a narrow street near Myeong Dong. Scooters and mopeds with modified cargo bins on the back zip through the crowded alley, alight with various signs that are blinking, digitally scrolling, inflated, or moving. My Abunim (father-in-law) spots a restaurant to his liking and we scurry in, sitting 6 to a table that in America might comfortable seat 2 or 3.

The order is placed. The restaurant has maybe 15 tables and they were all packed, steam rising from the hot pots on each one that were cooking over an open flame. Empty soju bottles littered each table, and the din was more like that of a stock exchange trading floor than a restaurant.

I’m looking toward the back of the restaurant and I see waitresses using a net to dip deep into a 20+ gallon tank to scoop up 2lb-ish octopuses. This piqued my interest as to what I was about to eat. I have eaten plenty of cooked octopus and squid in Japanese, Korean, and American restaurants. But what I saw next alarmed me.

There was some commotion to my left. I turned to see a man and a woman seated a small table. He was in a suit and tie and she was dressed fashionably. They were calmly seeking the assistance of a waitress. When the waitress noticed what they needed, she bolted for the back of the restaurant and grabbed some tongs.

There was a live octopus that had successfully maneuvered out of their boiling pot of noodles, onto the table, and was clearly thinking about rappelling down the wooden leg of the table.

It was shocking for sure, but also entertaining as we all seemed to get a good chuckle.

Then our super hot serving platter of noodles arrived.

The waitress was holding a plate with a live octopus in it. She grabbed the octopus with some tongs, and shoved in the noodle dish on our table. She covered it with the contents of the dish so it was buried. I thought, “Okay, okay. This isn’t so bad…I can’t even see it.”

Then the octopus realized it was in a super hot pile of noodles and started trying to get out. Its tentacles moved all over the place, its head popped out of the top, and it was clearly straining. The struggle slowed as it cooked and eventually, it was done. The waitress used scissors to cut the octopus up into bite-size pieces and left us to enjoy our dish.

I’m a very open-minded person and love to travel, so I forced out the internal thought, “That was…um…different.” And then I ate.

This experience got me thinking. What judgments do I have around food, diet, culture, style, etc. I looked around. The restaurant is packed. People have sought out this restaurant for its fresh seafood, and are enjoying their meal. Why was my response immediately to be shocked?

For starters, it was unique to me. I’ve never eaten a dish like this, nor have I even seen something like this on TV. Second, I’ve been conditioned for 33 years to eat a certain way and have developed countless expectations about what is normal and what is not.

Sure, eating a pizza is normal for me, but there wasn’t a pizza joint for miles (and if there were it would have things like bulgogi meat and corn on it). Eating fresh seafood is absolutely normal for Koreans who live on peninsula and have depended on seafood for millennia.

What foods do we eat in America that might be considered a little weird? My family always enjoyed lobster as a treat, or when celebrating a special occasion. Occasionally, my mom would even bring home live lobster, with their claws banded, to cook at home. Is there anything strange about that?

Let’s see. First of all, lobsters are bottom-feeding, scavenging spiders of the sea. It’s actually kind of gross when you think about it. And when cooking them at home, you boil a pot of water, and drop them in head first (to limit the suffering…haha!). Then we wear silly bibs to protect our clothing, crack them open with primitive tools, eat with our hands, and create a sloppy mess within a 5-foot radius.

Still sound appealing? Try ordering a shellfish platter at the Capital Grille while hosting a group of high-ranking Muslim Turks and watch their expression (this actually happened to Jaime and I a few years ago). They’ll be repulsed and offended.

We have created layers and layers of judgments about what is normal over the years. All of our experiences have developed very significant definitions about what we “like” and “don’t like.”

But what if we release those judgments for a minute? What if we can convince ourselves that things aren’t better or worse, they’re just different. For something to be better or worse means that we have judged and labeled it as such. That kind of thinking can be very limiting.

My 3-week journey introduced me to food, places and people that were unique. With limited beliefs, my trip would have been long and exhausting. With an open mind of non-judgment, every day was a breathtaking adventure of new and wonderful experiences.

In what ways are your judgments and limited beliefs holding you back from experiencing life with wonderment and joy? Think about it.

NOTE: I could have written pages and pages about other unique experiences that challenged my thoughts around what is normal and not normal, such as sleeping on the floor, bumping into people in crowded areas, or running red lights. I also could have also used countless examples of other “weird” things we do in America, such as drink 32 ounces of soda at a time, or go “dutch” (i.e. split checks) on dates or with friends, or call our elders by their first name. These are all things that Koreans find alarming, strange, or unique in America. Keep an open mind and at least acknowledge that these judgments exist!

My Life List

By Jaime Willis

A few years ago, veteran blogger and internet maven Maggie Mason decided to write a Life List.  This isn't a new idea, and Maggie certainly wasn't trying to start a revolution -- she just wanted a list of things that she could accomplish written out for her and her readers to see.  The difference with Maggie's Life List is that she's doing it.  Making plans, big and small, to cross off items on her life list.  Her Life List truly has taken on a life of its own -- companies have sponsored some of her items and she created an  'summit' to bring together some of her favorite internet friends together in person to life-list-it together.

This year, Maggie went even further.  With her partner in crime, The Queso's Laura Mayes, they've created "Camp Mighty."  Camp Mighty is a three-day 150 people super-summit for regular folks to tackle their life lists in a really neat way.

Of course, I'm going.

I'll be honest -- I'm so excited to be a part of this because Maggie and Laura are so fun in their blogs, I'm certain they'll be as fun in person.  But I'm also a little bit nervous.  I'm not bringing anyone with me -- so it'll be just like real camp -- walking into a room with a 150 strangers and hoping you walk out with 150 (or at least one or two!) great friends.

One of our homework assignments is to create (or update) our Life List.  Since I've never really sat down and written a full list of awesome things I want to do, I'm creating mine now.

And, fair warning, I'm going to cheat a little bit to add in some of the really cool things I've already accomplished that I'm pretty proud of. I'm sure I'll be adding and subtracting, but here's what I have so far.

Jaime's Life List

Travel/Location

1. Visit all seven continents (North America, South America, Europe, Asia, Australia, Africa, Antarctica) 

2. Visit all fifty U.S. States (Alabama, Alaska, Arizona, Arkansas, California, Colorado, Connecticut, Delaware, Florida, Georgia, Hawaii, Idaho, Illinois, Indiana, Iowa, Kansas, Kentucky, Louisiana, Maine, Maryland, Massachusetts, Michigan, Minnesota, Mississippi, Missouri, Montana, Nebraska, Nevada, New Hampshire, New Jersey, New Mexico, New York, North Carolina, North Dakota, Ohio, Oklahoma, Oregon, Pennsylvania, Rhode Island, South Carolina, South Dakota, Tennessee, Texas, Utah, Vermont, Virginia, Washington, West Virginia, Wisconsin, Wyoming)

3. Visit the top 50 cities in the Foreign Policy Index (New York, London, Tokyo, Paris, Hong Kong, Chicago, Los Angeles, Singapore, Sydney, Seoul, Brussels, San Francisco, Washington D.C., Toronto, Beijing, Berlin, Madrid, Vienna, Boston, Shanghai, Buenos Aires, Stockholm, Zurich, Moscow, Barcelona, Dubai, Rome, Amsterdam, Mexico City, Montreal, Geneva, Miami, Munich, Sao Paolo, Bangkok, Copenhagen, Houston, Taipai, Atlanta, Istanbul, Milan, Cairo, Dublin, New Delhi, Mumbai, Osaka, Kuala Lumpur, Rio de Janeiro, Tel Aviv)

4. Visit at least 50 countries (Antigua, Argentina, Australia, Austria, Bahamas, Bahrain, Barbardos, Belgium, Belize, Bolivia, Brazil, Cambodia, Canada, Chile, China, Costa Rica, Cuba, Cyprus, Czech Republic, Denmark, Dominican Republic, Ecuador, Egypt, England, Ethiopia, Finland, France, Germany, Greece, Guatemala, Guyana, Haiti, Honduras, Hungary, Iceland, India, Indonesia, Ireland, Israel, Italy, Jamaica, Japan, Kazakhstan, Kenya, South Korea, Liechtenstein, Lithuania, Luxembourg, Mexico, Monaco, Morocco, Nepal, Netherlands, New Zealand, Nicaragua, Norway, Northern Ireland, Panama, Paraguay, Peru, Philippines, Poland, Portugal, Romania, Russia, St. Kitts, St. Lucia, Samoa, San Marino, Scotland, Sierra Leone, Singapore, South Africa, Spain, Sweden, Switzerland, Taiwan, Thailand, Trinidad, Turkey, Ukraine, United States, Uruguay, Vanuatu, Vatican City, Venezuela, Vietnam, Wales)

5. Live in New York City (at least part time).  

6. Buy a cottage in Michigan. 

Health

1.  Reach Goal Weight (-35 lbs from today's weight); Maintain it (+/- 10 lbs) for 2 years in a row.  (I've reached the goal weight in question in 2009, but didn't keep it off.  I'd like to get down there again and keep it off!) Total weight lost: -25 | -50 | -75 | -100 | -125  | -150

2.  Run, run, run! (5k, 8k, 10k, 15k (Running Hot Chocolate 15k in December 2011), Half-Marathon, Sprint Triathlon, International Triathlon, 50 10ks in 2011)

3.  Be stronger!  (50 real pushups in a row (10 | 20 | 30 | 40 | 50),  1 pull-up, 100 sit-ups in a row, 3-min plank)

Education

1. Graduate! (Bachelors, Juris Doctor, Masters, Medical Doctor (I know this one is not likely to happen unless I get fabulously wealthy, but I don't want to give up all hope!)) 

2.  Credentials (Pass New York Bar Exam, Get Sworn In, Get ELI-MP Certified, Get Associate Certified Coach Credential) 

Finances

1. Pay off Student Loans.

2.  Have eight months of savings. 

3.  Buy a house. 

4. Pay cash for a car. 

5. Be able to work for myself full-time. 

6. Buy some real artwork for my house (Done and Done!). 

Cool Experiences

1.  Zipline through the rain forest of Costa Rica. 

2. Climb the Wallace Monument in Scotland. 

3. Watch the sunset in Oia, Greece.

4. See the Sistine Chapel.

5. Touch a real Van Gogh (don't tell, but I touched it very carefully!). 

6. See inside a Volcano (at Pompei and New Mexico). 

7. Visit the remains of Pompei. 

8.  See Stonehenge. 

9.  Ride a camel to the Egyptian Pyramids.

10.  Ride a boat in Cambodia. 

11. Have a hot-air balloon ride.

12.  Take a class at Trapeze School. 

13.  Parasail over a Tropical Island. 

14.  Take a Zero-G ride.

15.  Go on a vacation with the whole big family. 

16.  See Wootstock live. 

17.  See a TED talk live.

18.  Be on a Oprah show. 

19.  Be interviewed by the Today Show.

20.  Write a book.  (Want to write another one though). 

21.  Take a flight booked the same day.

22.  Try Parkour. 

23.  Rappel down something.

24.  Run an obstacle course confidently. 

25.  Play in a Scrabble Tournament.

26.  Run the bases at Yankee Stadium.

27.  Make cookies with my nephews.

28.  Visit the first Starbucks store. 

29.  Spend a summer at the beach. 

30.  Set up a college scholarship.

31.  Make a (silver jewelry) ring from scratch.

32.  Chase a Tornado. 

33.  Eat at a 4-star restaurant, watch a Broadway show, and stay in a glitzy hotel in New York City. 

34. Walk across the Brooklyn Bridge.

35. See the Northern Lights. 

36. Do a talk in front of a crowd of 1,000+.

37.  Pick a lock. 

38.  Be quoted.

39.  Learn at least one dance. 

40.  Take a painting class.

41. Climb Dumyat. 

Be Like Finland?

By Jaime Willis

For educators, reformers and wonks, Finland has, in the past several years, become the 'gold standard' of effective public K-12 education.

Finland, a county in the icy north of Europe, has a population of about 5.3 million people, roughly the same population and climate of the State of Minnesota.

In 1971, the government of Finland commissioned a study on their public education that conclude that education was the key to boosting the national economy.  As a result, they instituted several reforms to their current education model: reducing class sizes, boosting teacher pay, and requiring all teachers to complete a rigorous master's program (the last reform was given 8 years of preparation time so the existing work force had time to comply).


What is perhaps more notable than what they chose to do is what they chose NOT to do.  Finland soundly rejected the standardized testing model -- students in Finland are only required to take one standardized exam at the end of their schooling as a college entrance test.  Finnish teachers have a federal curriculum, but use it as a guide for creating their own lesson plans and designing their own course structure.  Finland also doesn't track students (honors/remedial courses) and doesn't have struggling/failing students repeat grades.

The results are pretty impressive.  The 2009 Program for International Student Assessment (PISA), an exam covering math, science, and reading and given every three years to 15-year-olds around the world showed Finnish students scoring 3rd in the world in reading, 2nd in science, and 6th in math.  The United States, by contrast, was 31st (in a field of 65) in reading and math and 23rd in science.

Since the 1971 reforms, K-12 teaching in Finland has become an esteemed career.  The country's Masters in Education programs are so popular that only 1 student in 9 or 10 is accepted.  The best and brightest, and frequently most passionate educators are saturated throughout the entire public school system, rather than targeted in small pockets of "good" school districts.  As a result, the difference between the "best" and "worst" public schools in Finland is negligible -- all students are doing the same, regardless of their race, ethnicity, or economic status.

So, the question of the hour is how can we in the United States take these research-based reforms that are working so well in a tiny homogenous country in Europe and apply them to a country whose population is almost 60 times greater?

I'd think it be really interesting to have a state serve as an incubator for this model.  Mississippi may be a great test case.  The state has a population of under 3 million, and their students consistently score in the bottom quartile in standardized tests.  Could Mississippi State work with their public universities to create a rigorous master's program? Could the state afford to boost the salary of public educators across the state to entice graduates to stay in Mississippi and teach?  Could the local economy support the infrastructure changes required to reduce class sizes? How differently would Mississippi look 10 years from now if it were able to start making these changes today?

Finland has a bursting high-tech market with companies like Nokia leading the way.  Could Mississippi become the next Silicon Valley?

What challenges do you think any state faces in introducing Finnish education reforms?  Are any states introducing these reforms already and if so, to what effect?

I know I am excited by the idea of breeding a fertile ground for passionate educators and this reform model seems like one great way to do it.

---
Research on this post comes, in part, from a great article in The New Republic entitled "Children Must Play."