Good Things

By Jaime WIllis

"Expecting the world to treat you fairly because you are good is like expecting the bull not to charge you because you are a vegetarian." -Dennis Wholey

If there is a "downside" to being an optimist, it's this -- I am really and truly shocked when "bad" things happen.  If I buy a lottery ticket, I really believe, despite the odds, that I am going to be the one to win.  I believe that if I want something bad enough, it'll happen.

And while this optimism and its partner-in-crime, persistence, have done some amazing work in my life, it's not a foolproof thing.  "Good" things don't always happen to good people.  Life is not always fair. 

This week, I had the opportunity to experience that firsthand, and I want to share with you today why I am grateful for the disappointment. 

On Monday morning, I found out that the Good Thing that I had been waiting for wasn't going to happen.  I was really sad -- I wanted the Good Thing so much.  I did everything I could to ensure the Good Thing was mine.  But, I still didn't get the Good Thing I wanted.  

Then, I got a little angry.  Did someone sabotage my changes of getting the Good Thing?  Was there an anti-Jaime group out there hoping and plotting to ensure the Good Thing would never be given to me?  

Then I realized that I didn't really want to be sad or mad about the loss of the Good Thing.  I wanted to be Jaime -- happy, positive about life, and ready and willing to share my gifts and talents with the world.  So I called my friends and said: "The Good Thing didn't happen and I am disappointed, but I know the Right Thing will work out for me." 

While it would have been cool for the Good Thing to happen, just because it didn't is no reason for me to ruin my week, or even ruin my day.  And there is certainly no need for me to mope around in pity or stomp around in sadness when I have the opportunity to be WHO I really want to be -- just Jaime.  Happy.  Fulfilled.  Ready for the next Good Thing to happen. 

Because sometimes, kids, the Good Thing that you want so badly isn't the Right Thing for you at that time.  Sometimes the Right Thing is disappointment.  Sometimes the Right Thing is loss.  I wrote on my facebook wall earlier this week that "Disappointment is what makes success so sweet.  If you were never let down or bummed out, you'd never really know how great it felt to accomplish something." 

This week, I needed to learn a bit about disappointment.  This week, I needed to learn that the Good Thing not happening to me wasn't my fault, it just was.  This week, I needed to learn that even when I do my best work and put my best foot forward, it still wasn't meant to be.

After hearing about my disappointment, one of my friends said to me, "Whew!! That was close.  This truly means that there is something else really important that you need to be doing! And to think... you almost settled for this."  I *love* this reaction.  It is so positive -- I carried it with me the rest of the week.  

Sometimes, life isn't about right and wrong, good or bad.  Sometimes, life is just about the experience.  By figuring out how to quickly move past my disappointment and back to my "regular" self, I can say that I have honestly had an amazing week this week.  Lots of good things happened and I know the next Good Thing is just around the corner.  

Have a great weekend everyone!  Good Things are waiting for you too!

Optimism May Save Your Life

- by Jaime Willis

"It's Impossible," said Pride.

"It's Risky," said Experience.

"It's Pointless," said Reason.

"Give it a try," whispered the Heart.

I've spent the last week in a bit of an emotional upheaval. I called my Grandma on Wednesday evening to chat, only to find out that my Grandfather's health had taken a turn for the worse. Grandpa's cancer was back with a vengeance and his oncologist told the family there was nothing more Grandpa could do but to go home "and wait." Instead of blindly accepting a death sentence, the whole family went into "Get 'er Done" mode. This past Friday, after a squeezed-in appointment with a world-renowned cancer doctor twelve and half hours away from my Grandparent's home, Grandpa was given a new medical regimen with a 70% success rate! While Grandpa is not yet out of the woods, it is incredibly encouraging to learn that there is a viable treatment available!

Other than providing Grandpa with a fantastic medical treatment, the Doctor shared with us another secret to all of our health.

Be Optimistic.

It's that simple. In a 2004 Dutch study, almost one thousand 65 - 85 year olds were tested to determine their relative levels of optimism (vs. pessimism). Then these patients were tracked for ten years, in which time 397 of the 941 patients died. What is fascinating about the study is that the pessimists died at almost double the rate of the optimists! This study has been repeated several times, with similar results. Researchers are still unsure why optimists fare better in life, but it's a fact that optimists live longer lives.

Pessimists not only see the glass as half-empty, but also spend a lot of their time worrying about what bad thing is coming their way next, so they don't really even enjoy life when it is going well. Optimists, on the other hand, live happily through the good times, and remain uplifted during the tough times by believing that there is an answer or a way through their problems.

Here is proof positive that priming yourself to succeed is not only helpful for goal-setting, but may be life-saving!

So, what do you have to be happy about today? Leave us a note or a story in the comment section below.