- by Jaime Willis
Lots of us have lofty dreams like this, right? I want to be a millionaire. I want to own a Lear Jet. I want to get into Harvard Med School. I want to win an Oscar. I want to be on the Oprah show.
What I find fascinating is that very few of us ask ourselves WHY we want to have those things. When you drill down beyond the fluffy exterior of your dream to its core, you may be surprised at what you find.
Travie McCoy, for example, goes onto sing that he would use his billions to help Katrina victims, the hungry, and the less fortunate. The thing is, does McCoy have to have billions to do those things? Absolutely not! He could be helping rebuild New Orleans and feed the poor right now.
Back when I was teaching law school admissions test preparation, I actually spent a fair amount of time convincing my students *not* to go to law school. Not because law school is an inherently bad goal, but it just wasn't the right goal for them--they were doing it to make their parents happy, or to delay "real life" or because they were hoping to become rich (law school really isn't the road to wealth for most graduates anymore, sorry to burst your bubble).
The same principle applies to people who are obsessed with losing to a certain number on the scale. It's not the number that you are really aiming for--it's the feeling you get when you feel strong, healthy, and sexy, right?
When you are trying to figure out what goal(s) you are striving for, ask yourself what your motivation is for getting to that goal.
Is there any other way to get there? For example, "I want to get a law degree to help refugees gain asylum in the United States." Do you have to have the law degree to work for a non-profit or NGO that does just that?
Is your goal a goal or a means to another end? For example, "I want to be rich so I can travel more." Can't you figure out a way to travel without having to be "wealthy" first?
Don't limit your success by too narrowly defining what success looks like!
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