Love More, Fear Less

-by Matt Leedham

My New Year’s resolution is simple. It’s not a goal. It’s not a metric to hit. It’s not entirely measurable or specific.

But it is inspiring. And it challenges me to grow.

Love more. Fear less.

That’s it. It’s more of a mantra than anything else. Yet it speaks volumes to me. In fact, the depth of its meaning for me is immeasurable.

You see, I’ve been living for many years at the whim of circumstance. I’ve tried to project, outwardly, an image of success, confidence, and perfection. While digging deep into who I am this year, I’ve discovered that I was living in a cycle of fraudulent fakery.

To me, love more has many meanings. Not only does it mean to have and express gratitude for all of the wonderful people and experiences in my life, but it goes one step deeper. It means having an unconditional love for myself, something I had never experienced before.

Which leads me to fear less. I have never allowed myself to live fully, in great appreciation of who I was. I was always not something. I was always not someone. I was always so busy projecting out a confidence that was inauthentic, that I found myself trying to protect the image that I wanted others to see. An image of perfection.

This inauthentic image prevented me from taking risks. It prevented me from going 110% in life to explore my full potential. It prevented me from living fully. And for what? To maintain an undefined image of success that I wanted others to see?

This year, I choose to live differently.

This year, I choose to express my gifts and talents freely, without the pressure to impress anyone. This year, I choose to understand my own ideal image of success, and not try to live up to an imaginary one I’ve created that I think will please others.

This year I choose to love more and fear less.

If this resonates with you, leave a comment and us know what you’re thinking.

The Red Pill

-by Matt Leedham

“You take the blue pill, the story ends.

You wake up in your bed and believe whatever you want to believe.

You take the red pill,

you stay in Wonderland and I show you how deep the rabbit hole goes.”

“I’m only offering you the truth…

Nothing more.”

- Morpheus from The Matrix

Consciousness is a funny thing. Once you are conscious, you cannot go back. A bell cannot be un-rung. What has been seen cannot be unseen. The question is, are you up for the challenge?

To explore your own consciousness (i.e. how aware you are of your true self), is a challenging journey. Ultimately, you may discover some ugly things. Not surprisingly though, you will also discover some beautiful things. The challenge is, can you let all of that go in complete non-judgment to accept your authenticity for exactly what is?

No?

What if I told you that your true self is perfect? Your true self must be perfect. It is you in complete form. And whether or not you believe in divine creation or biological evolution, you cannot deny that, logically, you are exactly as you should be. Perfect.

This understanding and realization is the truth. And when you come to grips with the truth, you release all of the imaginary things that hold you back. You just live. And live perfectly.

As always, the choice is yours.

Will you stay in Wonderland and see how far the rabbit hole goes?

Happiness Is Not The Goal

- by Matt Leedham

“The purpose of life is not to be happy. It is to be useful, to be honorable, to be compassionate, to have it make some difference that you have lived and lived well.”
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

My friends, I’m afraid he’s right. If you have your sights set on happiness, you’re going to be searching for quite some time.

Happiness is a result.

Feeling happy is what happens when you live your life with purpose and meaning. Happiness occurs when you are grounded in core values that you intentionally act on daily…with conviction.

Happiness is not the goal. It’s a result of living well. Of being part of something bigger than yourself. Of contributing. Of being authentic.

Do these things, and you will one day wake up feeling fulfilled. And happy.

P.S. Same goes for money. Those in search of money will be kept very busy searching for money. Money should not be the goal. Money is typically the result living well, being creative and innovative, working hard, being responsible, and having your priorities straight. Money is the result.

Be Authentic

- by Matt Leedham

Authenticity is an interesting word, but an even more fascinating concept. It has Greek roots from autos “self” + hentes “doer, being.” You could interpret this as “being yourself.”

The first step to being yourself is knowing yourself. Have you asked yourself why you are where you are in life? Why you have the things you have? A few years ago, I really started to notice that question pop up in my head. Why did I go to college? Why did I study Sociology? How did I end up in this career path with these possessions? Was it intentional or was it a result of expectations of other people, one after another, that has led me here? Or worse yet, was it a result of pressure from that amorphous group of “other people,” our society, that has led me here.

I started asking myself the tough questions. I started getting myself aligned. I reflected and defined my core values, and then to took the time to ensure my personal vision and the goals I set were in alignment with those core values.

So, if the first step is knowing who you are, the second step must be “doing what you are.” As Seth Godin says in his post on authenticity, “you could spend your time wondering if what you say you are is really you. Or you could just act like that all the time.” Well said! As we know, actions speak louder than words.

Let go of preconceived categories and labels of what you should be. Reflect on who you are. But most importantly, ACT on what you are. That is being authentic.

Thoughts? Questions? Use the comment section below.