Love More, Fear Less

-by Matt Leedham

My New Year’s resolution is simple. It’s not a goal. It’s not a metric to hit. It’s not entirely measurable or specific.

But it is inspiring. And it challenges me to grow.

Love more. Fear less.

That’s it. It’s more of a mantra than anything else. Yet it speaks volumes to me. In fact, the depth of its meaning for me is immeasurable.

You see, I’ve been living for many years at the whim of circumstance. I’ve tried to project, outwardly, an image of success, confidence, and perfection. While digging deep into who I am this year, I’ve discovered that I was living in a cycle of fraudulent fakery.

To me, love more has many meanings. Not only does it mean to have and express gratitude for all of the wonderful people and experiences in my life, but it goes one step deeper. It means having an unconditional love for myself, something I had never experienced before.

Which leads me to fear less. I have never allowed myself to live fully, in great appreciation of who I was. I was always not something. I was always not someone. I was always so busy projecting out a confidence that was inauthentic, that I found myself trying to protect the image that I wanted others to see. An image of perfection.

This inauthentic image prevented me from taking risks. It prevented me from going 110% in life to explore my full potential. It prevented me from living fully. And for what? To maintain an undefined image of success that I wanted others to see?

This year, I choose to live differently.

This year, I choose to express my gifts and talents freely, without the pressure to impress anyone. This year, I choose to understand my own ideal image of success, and not try to live up to an imaginary one I’ve created that I think will please others.

This year I choose to love more and fear less.

If this resonates with you, leave a comment and us know what you’re thinking.

New Year, New Who

-by Scott Sullivan (one of Velocity’s new extraordinary additions)

This time of year always makes me think of gifts, but not the kind that are wrapped with shiny paper and decorated with fancy ribbons (as FUN as those are to open!). As a life coach I constantly remind my clients that their strengths and gifts far outweigh their perceived weaknesses. The passing of one year to the next is a wonderful opportunity for us to reflect on our gifts. As I foray into the world of blogging each week, I would like to share with you personal and meaningful stories about my life in an effort to explore WHO I am. Together we will begin a journey that will help you define WHO you are and WHO you want to be…

My Gift

I have avoided airports for the past few years. In August of 2009, while waiting for a plane to take me from Tel Aviv to Boston, I discovered that my partner of ten years was in love with another man. You see, he had left me two months earlier but I had spent the entire summer attempting to reconcile. I fought, I battled…I cried every tear and felt the panoply of emotions that break ups seemingly force us to feel. I could not understand why anyone, why HE, would not want to be with me. Ten years of adventures was too much of an investment to squander. And then to find out it took him two months to fall in love again?

I started to think that there was something inherently wrong or broken about me.

When my connecting flight from Atlanta to Boston was about to depart that sultry summer day, I was faced with a life altering choice. Do I begin the process of moving forward and accept what I cannot change or do I return to our home in Budapest and fight for my man?

I chose to give up the self-loathing battle.

Instead I chose an internal self exploration and the emotional work of the past 2.5 years has now brought me to a fundamentally new level of self acceptance and understanding. I chose not to be with someone who did not want to be with me. I chose to build a strong but supple self esteem, tempered by years of breathtaking experiences, respected by innumerable acts of kindness, accepted as me, all of me, just the way I am.

Two weeks ago I faced my sad memory head on as I confidently walked through Reagan National Airport and onto a plane that took me to the ski slopes of Montana to celebrate the most amazing Christmas of my entire life with my family. Now I must be forthright, tears were running down my face (I am Italian-American and we do not just live life...we FEEL life). They were tears of absolute joy.

I have learned that love is not an investment, love is love, the most exhilarating of all the human emotions. I choose to love myself unconditionally.

My journey of self-love and self-embracing saved me from years of bitterness and self-loathing as I exposed myself emotionally to whomever would provide me with support and comfort. I would like to thank all of my friends, my family, my life coaches, my students and even my guardian angels in heaven for allowing me to grieve, to struggle, to temporarily capitulate, to experiment, to cry, and ultimately to live . . . boldly!

My gift this holiday season is ME, just the way I am… (plus some cool presents from my nieces and nephews).

What are your gifts and how do you choose to live in 2012? Who do you choose to be?

Watch my video...I would love to hear from you below or by email!

2012: Massive and Immediate Action

-by Matt Leedham

My New Year’s resolution is to not write about New Year’s Resolutions.

No, this year is about massive and immediate action. In fact, you will begin to see the effects of that action shortly.

For starters, we’re launching a new website. Everything is in production and is coming along nicely. You will likely see us go live in the first week of January.

We’re also launching an exciting new program, designed by 4 professional coaches, focused on a method that will drive sustainable change for those that are inspired to grow in 2012.

Next, we have partnered with two other premier coaches to enhance our ability to offer you incredible content online, in our workshops, and in one-to-one coaching.

And finally, you will see the contributions of these two amazing coaches in our blog posts going forward. Keep an eye on a couple of new voices started next week!

For you, in 2012, I wish the following massive and immediate action:

• Love more
• Fear less
• Invest in yourself
• Express gratitude
• Develop deeper connections
• Be creative
• Know your unique talents
• Love your unique gifts
• Step into possibilities

Happy New Year from all of us at Velocity!

Spirituality: Defined

-by Matt Leedham

You will find no definition of spirituality here.

I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to deceive you, but I’ve come to realize that spirituality is a very personal journey. It would be impossible to simply provide you with a definition.

Instead, perhaps I can at least give you the gift of awareness, if only for a brief moment. As comfortable or uncomfortable as you are with the concept of spirituality, take a moment to stop what you are doing and reflect on what spirituality means to you.

Need help? Here are some questions to consider:

• Does spirituality have to do with your beliefs you have about your soul?
• Or does the definition lie in who you are?
• Does it have to do with your core values?
• Does it have to do with your relationship with God?
• Or your relationship with others?
• Does it have to do with energy?
• Is it about connection, or love, or expression?
• Does it have to do with the universe?

Have you simply never considered it before?

Those that specialize in health and wellness have identified 4 core areas of well-being: Spiritual, Emotional, Mental, and Physical. How would you rate your satisfaction or fulfillment in these areas?

I’m full of more questions than answers today, I’m afraid.

I’d be very curious to hear your thoughts on the matter. Please share a comment below.

Nirvana During the Holidays

-by Matt Leedham

For some people, the holidays are filled with gifts and surprises, yummy treats to enjoy, and lots of love and connection with friends and family. For others, it’s crowded airports, last-minute trips to the shopping mall, arguments with siblings, and traffic on the highway.

For most of us, it’s a combination of all those things.

No matter where you fall on the spectrum, you will likely need to take some time and relax, refocus, and re-energize. Try not to let the stress of the holidays interrupt your ability to give and receive with the ones you love.

As my family and I celebrate Christmas this year, I will keep this little cartoon handy, and thought you might want to as well. Merry Christmas!

This was posted on YogaDawg’s Facebook page,
but I’m not sure who the original credit belongs to.

Make a Difference Today

-by Matt Leedham

Hi everyone.  Occasionally, Jaime and I reach out to our readers for help.  And this is one of those times.  I could really use your help, and so can some kids in Northern Virginia.  Please read below and be in touch if you can be of assistance!

The Short Version:

I need your help.  My wife works at an afterschool program for disadvantaged youth and needs arts, sports, and academic supplies.  Take a look at the list below and let me know if you have anything lying around your house that you can contribute.  You are all awesome people and I am eternally grateful for whatever you can give! J

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The Long Version:

For those that don’t know, my wife has recently transitioned full-time from being an entrepreneur  in the unique field of multi-cultural marketing (for 8+ years!) to working with immigrant youth.  This is her passion after dealing with the struggles of assimilating to a new society when she was young.  Immigrant advocacy and education is now her focus and her first stop on this journey is running an afterschool program to better understand the needs and resources available to this demographic.

Her program is called the Culmore Safe Youth Project (CSYP) and is run out of Alternative House, a non-profit that calls itself the “abused and homeless children’s refuge.”   Culmore is near Bailey’s Crossroads and is a predominantly Hispanic immigrant community living in low-income apartment complexes.  Her “center,” if you can call it that, is single room about the size of a typical apartment living room (maybe 25’ x 25’).  She averages 22 kids per day in that small space and tries to provide a safe space for children while creating an atmosphere conducive to studying, physical activity, and socializing.  It’s tough, but she’s really making a difference.

My wife is extraordinarily gifted in working with troubled, disadvantaged youth.  What she can’t do is provide all of these kids with the tools and resources they need to learn and grow.  And so, it has become my personal mission to raise money, awareness, and resources to support her.  I believe this is my strength, and a way for me to contribute.  In fact, I’m in the process of planning a fundraising event in February that will be A LOT of fun, and you will all be invited!

So, my “ask” of you is to review the wishlist below.  Do you have any of these items?  Are any of these things collecting dust in your home?  What about your friends or family members?  Please take a moment to review the list below and let me know what you might have that is either not being used, or that you’d be willing to part with.

I’ve always believed in asking for help.  You just never know who or how someone can help you until you ask.

Can you help?

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CSYP Wishlist

Arts & Crafts

• Paint Sharpees & regular color Sharpees
• Cool coloring project kits
• Colored construction paper
• Regular color marker set
• Lego set
• Miscellaneous arts & craft projects and supplies
• Play Doe
• Paint sets with brushes
• Any other general art supplies

Books

• 3-6th grad level reading books (fiction and non-fiction)
• Educational books
• Coloring books

Electronics

• Computers w/ or w/out monitors (they do not need monitors)
• Just Dance Game 2nd or 3rd version (Wii)
• Other Wii games
• Computer games (strategy and leisure)
• Boombox with CD player
• Computer printer & extra ink cartridges
• Ethernet cable splitter

DVDs

• Educational age-appropriate documentaries
• Discovery DVDs

Outdoor Equipment

• Badminton racquets
• Pogo sticks
• Jump Ropes
• Hoola hoops
• Soccer balls
• Footballs
• Rubber balls for Dodge Ball

Gift Cards / Prizes

• Foot Locker
• Barnes & Noble
• Target
• iTunes

Games

• Non-board games
• Strategy games
• One-player games
• Group games

Activities

• Movie Tickets
• Amusement Park Tickets
• Tickets to anything that would be appropriate for a field trip

*Many people have already told me that they don’t have any of these items, but would like to contribute some money to buy these items for the program.  A number of us (mostly family and close friends) have decided to forgo Christmas gifts this year and pool our money together to support the program.  You are welcome to join us in donating to the pool.  I can’t even imagine the kind of academic/art supply shopping spree we’re going to go on after the holidays!  J

What's Your Superpower?

-by Matt Leedham

Su-per-pow-er (noun) \ˈsü-pər-ˌpau̇(-ə)r\
A power greater in scope or magnitude than that which is considered natural or has previously existed.

My superpower is creative logic. I know that sounds weird, but creativity is one my greatest strengths, yet I have a very strong sense of logic and can systematically turn an abstract (or creative) idea into a defined action plan and process.

Most superheroes have a team of super friends. They don’t need these other superheroes but they choose to surround themselves with friends that have complimentary superpowers. Together, they are a juggernaut, or an unstoppable force for good (usually).

Years ago, I discovered the importance of complimenting your skill set. That’s why Jaime and I have banded together.

But a few months ago, we discovered that growing the Superhero Alliance does not just add more individual superpowers, but it exponentially increases our superpower options and collectively creates an entirely NEW superpower.

Jaime and I are excited to unveil the next big development in Velocity’s future. We have partnered with a couple of amazing superheroes to expand our services and exponentially grow our impact. The project we have in development is SUPER exciting and is focused on sustainable change and personal growth. Both this project, and our new website will released in early January. Get excited!

What’s your superpower? What are your unique gifts and talents? Have you surrounded yourself with super friends that compliment your superpower?

And most importantly, how are you using your superpower to change/save/improve the world?